When my husband died eight years ago, I initially tried to fill out the probate forms myself. Since my husband’s solely owned financial assets were under the threshold to qualify as a “small estate” in Connecticut, I was told the probate process would be simplified and relatively straightforward. It was supposed to be much easier than the probate process I described in a previous blog post. I wanted to save money on attorney fees so decided to tackle the forms myself. In retrospect, I was using it as a distraction.

But in my widow fog, I didn’t get far. I went to the probate office several times for help. They would answer my question, but then it wouldn’t take long before I was confused again. After a month of struggling to understand which forms I needed to complete and how to complete them, I still had no idea what I was doing, and my brain felt overwhelmed. So I hired a probate attorney that my brother-in-law knew.

The day he died, my husband received an inheritance check from his uncle’s estate. The inheritance was supposed to go to his mom, but she said she wanted it to go to her son instead. So the check came to him. That was the one asset he had in his small estate as all our other assets were jointly owned or in my name. He had credit card debt that was more than the inheritance check, so I assumed that the inheritance would all go to his creditors, leaving nothing in his estate.

Enter my probate attorney. He knew the rule that you have nine months from when someone dies to turn down (disclaim) an inheritance, and it must be done in writing. Since my mother-in-law had not disclaimed the inheritance within nine months of her brother’s death, it was invalidated. Therefore, the money did not go to my husband’s estate, which was considered bankrupt because it has no other assets, and the creditors received nothing. My mother-in-law kept the inheritance and, after my husband’s estate was closed, she sent the inheritance to my daughter.

At the time, I didn’t quite understand what my attorney had done. He waved his magic wand, and my daughter got to keep her dad’s money. Last year while studying to be a financial planner, I learned the rule on disclaiming an inheritance, and it all clicked.

So if you’re considering filling out the probate forms yourself, learn from my lesson. Hire a probate attorney because they know laws that can be used to your advantage.