Checklist for 1-3 Months After
The list below has suggested tasks, separated into categories, for the first 1-3 months after your partner passes away. I threw myself into tackling tasks as a distraction, but I’m a type A personality. You can definitely defer some tasks if your finances are is in good shape or if you’re not up to tackling them, but I recommend finding a grief support group and looking into your state’s deadline of when you need to file for probate.
Download the pdf checklist of what to do after your spouse dies.
Grief Support:
Find a Support Group
My daughter and I joined an in person grief support group and found the experience invaluable. Read more about grief support groups and how to find one.
Read Books and/or Listen to Podcasts
I found reading books written by widowed parents and listening to podcasts hosted by other widowed parents both inspirational and helpful.
Administrative/Legal:
Gather Key Information
Collect the following information and documents in one place, as you will be asked for them many times:
- Death Certificate
- Will
- Social Security Numbers for you, your spouse and children
- Driver’s License Number
- Passport Number
- Marriage Certificate
- Divorce Decree (if relevant)
- Birth Certificate
File the Will with the Probate Court
Find out the deadline in your state for filing for probate, but in many states it is within 10-90 days after the death. Some states like New York and New Jersey don’t have a deadline. If there is no will but your spouse had assets only in their name, you still need to file for probate to transfer those assets to you.
You can find your local probate court by searching for “probate court” and your county’s name. You can also hire a probate attorney to take care of the whole probate process for you. My husband didn’t have a will so I initially tried to file the paperwork on my own, but I found the whole process so cumbersome and confusing that I eventually hired an attorney. This Forbes article gives an overview of what probate is and how it works.
Benefits:
Claim Social Security Benefits
Make an appointment with your local Social Security Administration office to find out what you qualify for, but these are the most common options for widowed parents:
- Lump Sum Death Benefit – Soon after reporting your spouse’s death, which is usually done by the funeral home, you will automatically receive a $255 lump sum death benefit. I was shocked to receive this check in the mail within a few weeks of my husband’s death, partly because I didn’t know it was coming to me, partly because it seemed like such a small, arbitrary amount.
- Surviving Child Benefits – Each of your children can receive a monthly benefit, based on your spouse’s earnings, until they turn 18 or graduate from high school, whichever is later.
- Surviving Spouse Caring for a Child Benefit – If your children are under the age of 16 and your income is under a certain amount, you can receive a monthly benefit, based on your spouse’s earnings, until they turn 16.
Note that there is a limit to the total amount that a family can receive per month. Read more about Social Security Survivor benefits in this blog post.
Claim Life Insurance Benefits
Contact the company that holds your or your spouse’s life insurance policies. You may have purchased them independently or else through your spouse’s employer. You will need to complete paperwork and provide the death certificate to file a claim.
Claim Benefits from Your Spouse’s Employer
Contact your spouse’s employer’s Human Resources department and former employers to find out if you are owed any benefits from unpaid salary, accrued vacation or sick time, pension, annuities or other benefits. I was surprised to learn that I was entitled to my husband’s pension, which he had earned through a long ago employer, unbeknownst to me.
Claim Benefits from Your Spouse’s Professional Organizations
Contact your spouse’s professional, fraternal and military organizations and unions to see if there are any benefits to which you are entitled.
Claim Federal Benefits
This tool on the USA.gov website can help you identify which, if any, federal benefits you are entitled to, including veteran’s benefits.
Financial:
Inform Credit Reporting Agencies
According to the Experian website, you can send one of the three credit bureaus, Equifax, Experian and TransUnion, a certified copy of the death certificate. They will flag your spouse’s credit report, which can help prevent identity theft. They will also let the other agencies know about the death, so you do not need to contact all three.
At the same time that you notify the credit bureau, request a copy of your spouse’s credit report. This will help you identify any credit cards that need to be closed.
Cancel Debit & Credit Cards
Cancel any debit and credit cards that are only in your spouse’s name. The financial institution will ask for a copy of the death certificate in order to close the account.
Close Bank Accounts
Close bank accounts that are only in your spouse’s name and stop any automatic deposits and withdrawals. You will need to provide a copy of the death certificate. If you have a joint banking account, that must be left open for at least a year.
Pay Joint & Important Bills
Pay bills that are in both of your names, as well as important bills including mortgage, utility and insurance. But, according to the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau website, you are generally not liable for any debt that is solely in your spouse’s name, such as credit card bills. If the debt needs to be paid, it would be paid through your spouse’s estate. (See the above section on filing the will with the Probate Court.)
According to the Federal Student Aid website, federal student loans are forgiven if the borrower dies. You will need to provide a copy of the death certificate.
Insurance:
Review Your Health Insurance
Check the status of your health insurance and cancel your spouse’s coverage. If your family was covered through your spouse’s employer, you might have a grace period before you have to find coverage elsewhere or else can elect continuation of health coverage through COBRA.
Review Your Auto Insurance
Cancel your spouse’s coverage and adjust yours, as needed.
Review Your Homeowner’s or Renter’s Insurance
Adjust your homeowner’s or renter’s insurance, as needed.